April 30, 2012
So we've been messaging after i messaged him first he added me on fb and apologized for taking so long. Then he tells me he likes me but doesn't know me and there is a lot of distance between us. But now he wont talk about us. Why would he bring it up in the first place then. I just wish he had never said that. Maybe then I wouldn't be completely terrified of losing him. There is a heavy feeling on my chest, like a stinging pain. I hate this. And honestly, at this point. I'm mad at him!
April 25, 2012
So he never responded. No acceptance on fb (request still pending), no add on skype, and no text. Well it hurts. A lot. But i'm burning the letter tomorrow, and i'm probably gonna cry. But i'm also letting go, and going to start with a clean slate in my life (particularly my love life). I'm telling myself i'll wait one more day because he might be out celebrating because he just finished his third year. maybe he'll add me on fb and skype tomorrow. maybe he'll text me and tell he how his exam went. maybe he'll check his stupid phone plan to see if he has nationwide texting... just maybe, he'll do something to show me i'm not a complete fool for thinking it could be something (that we could be something). =/ maybe...
April 21, 2012
Exams are done. Settled the situation with the formal guy. I'm planning to burn the letter to the Frosh Boss, while also saying good bye forever to the feelings I once felt for the guy I met and spent time with for a week. I'll do it on the next full moon, which is sometime next month. I met and made friends with one of my sisters friends. We were both under the influence, when we became very physically close. Nothing really happened. But I thought we were building something... I was wrong. I haven't heard from him since Monday. I'm giving him till 11:59 pm next Monday to find a way and message me. If he doesn't, well I guess it really was nothing... I seriously hate alcohol.
April 7, 2012
So, I texted it out with him and everything ended on a good note. He's flattered but unavailable. That and the mature manner in which he handled it, I respect him a lot for it. Trying to keep my mind from wondering to things that might lower my mood. Oh, and I'm over my Frosh boss crush. His lack of care for his health and that fact that he can only be nice to me when he's tipsy is incredibly unattractive. I still care for him, but I don't like who he is. I honestly feel like I'm slowly, but surely growing from all these lessons that I am left to learn and interpret on my own.
April 6, 2012
I found out he was a bit old for me, but it ended on a smooth note. I went to my formal and now I have the "pleasure" of dealing with a guy who drew my attention while under the influence, but wont return any of my messages. Praying it can work out. I'm going to call him tonight, or tomorrow.
March 24, 2012
